Collection: Tees
We start with shirts because every curmudgeon needs a uniform. For the man who’s got zero patience, maximum opinions, and a resting face that says “nope.” Whether he’s muttering under his breath, griping about gas prices, roasting humanity from the recliner, or just silently judging everyone at the store — these tees do the talking so he doesn’t have to.
Inside every crank is a big dark heart that actually cares… just don’t tell anyone.
Mood: annoyed, stylish, and deeply unbothered.
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CURMUDGEON SHOP™ LOGO TEE – Official Uniform of the Modern-Day Crank
Regular price From $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
THE THERMOSTAT POLICE.™ – Commander of Comfort & Complaint
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
GRUMPA™ Vintage Crest Tee — The Grand King of Grumble
Regular price From $18.50 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
GRUMP LEGEND.™ – People Pleasing Not Included Zero charm. Full conviction.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
CURMUDGEON.™ — The Grump. The Legend. The Definition.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
WAKES UP ANNOYED.™ – Grump Mode: Consistent
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
GROUCHY BOURBON.™ – Distilled Disapproval Since 1978 Rusty flask included. Vibes sold separately.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
LOVES DEEPLY.™ – Expressed Poorly, Felt Fully Not a hugger. Still a legend.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
DOESN’T BELIEVE.™ – In Texting. Talking. Or Smiling. And don’t even think about calling.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
GRUMBLING.™ – His Love Language of Choice Affection,but make it grumpy.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
RESTING LEAVE ME ALONE FACE.™ – He’s not mad. He’s just not interested.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
ALLERGIC TO SMALL TALK.™ – Not rude. Just realistic.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
CURMUDGEON.™ – Growls at the world. Melts for his grandkids.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
RIPPED.™ – If sarcasm burned calories, I’d be ripped.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
GRUMP LEGEND.™ – Zero Percent People-Pleaser Tee
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per -
COMPLAINS ABOUT THE NOISE.™ – Won’t Miss a Moment.
Regular price $24.99 USDRegular priceUnit price / per