He’s not mad. He just doesn’t care.
Not about your weather updates.
Not about your new patio furniture.
Not about anything that sounds remotely like small talk.
ALLERGIC TO SMALL TALK.™ is the official tee for men who don’t pretend to like socializing. If you’ve ever seen a guy bolt in the other direction when someone says “So, what do you do?” — this shirt is for him.
It’s funny, blunt, and brutally accurate.
Just like him.
🎁 Perfect Gift For:
• Husbands who never use exclamation marks
• Dads who give one-word answers and wear it like armor
• Grumps who treat enthusiasm like a contagious disease
• Anyone whose “Mm.” is a complete conversation
⚠️ Warning Label:
May result in fewer forced conversations, less party pressure, and total silence during car rides. Excellent for introverts with attitude. Not recommended for potlucks.
📖 Grumpy But Godly:
He may not speak often —
But when he does, it matters.
“Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent...” – Proverbs 17:28
(He’s not cold. He’s calculating whether it’s worth the words.)
🪵 Seriously Soft Tee:
Crafted from premium Bella+Canvas 3001 stock, this tee is made with 100% Airlume combed and ringspun cotton for serious softness and durability.
• Preshrunk for the perfect fit
• Designed, dyed & cut right here in the U.S.A.
• Heather colors contain a hint of poly — for stretch, structure, and curmudgeon-approved comfort
